Father's Day 2014

I woke up to find myself unexpectedly down and depressed this Father's Day. I really didn't expect it to have an affect on me, but live and learn.

I'm not depressed that I'm not seeing my father, or that I haven't since February. I'm sad because I have no desire to even phone him. I'm sad reflecting on how much he has let me down, and I'm sad because it hurts. It's no wonder I don't trust people at all.

This is also the third weekend in a row that my son has not been at home because his father has possession of him, and my body physically hurts because I miss him so much. I'm eager for him to return tomorrow, and I can't wait until next weekend when I get to enjoy some quality time with him ... before he heads to his father's for 18 straight days at the end of June and beginning of July. I wonder when this won't be so painful. Ever?

So anyway, I'm heading to the yoga studio to turn the pain up a notch today. Sometimes that's the only thing that gives me any relief.