Guess what I survived?

I debated on the best way to punctuate this title.
Guess what I survived?
Guess what? I survived!
Guess what? I survived.
How is this my life?

The judge's ruling came on Tuesday last week, and by Thursday, my son's father had obtained the SCRAM device and Interlock on his vehicle, and he was ready-set to take R.

The good news is that right now he's not exercising overnights on Thursdays because he lives too far away from the school R has to be at by 7:30 a.m. Friday. So Thursdays aren't changing too much for us from the way they've pretty much been since he arrived back in Dallas.

It's the first, third, and fifth weekends that I was certain would kill me. But you know, I was thinking AT LEAST we have soccer matches Saturday, and so I'll see my boy Saturday. But then it rained Friday night, and the matches were canceled due to wet fields, and my first weekend without my son resulted in my not seeing him for 48 excruciatingly long hours.

I survived, yeah, and I don't have to go through that again for two weeks, but it SUCKED. And that's not even the word for it because there is NO WORD for it.

I slept a lot, because that's one of my favorite methods of escaping ... and I put out the fall wreath and decorations at our house so that it would surprise him when he arrived home ... and I bought his favorite chocolates from Central Market.

I don't know how I'm ever going to get used to this, much less "enjoy" a "break," as some people phrase it.

I just do not understand how a man can leave the state in which his child resides for FIVE years and then come back whenever he wants to do so and receive this amount of possession and access. I simply do not understand it.